When I look back at my life, I giggle. In all of my dreams and aspirations, never once did I think, “My goals in life are to work at home with my family, preserve all my food, and grow and sell berries.”
Who am I? How could this happen?
The long story is incredibly complicated, but the short story is incredibly simple: GOD.
All my life, God has prepared me for the mission ahead of me. From a young age, I begged my parents to grow a garden. I remember once my dad helped me plant a strawberry patch, but not long after my mom mowed over it.
That was the end of my gardening adventures at home.
Luckily, my high school jobs directly prepared me for what I aspire to do today. I spent my first couple of working summers cleaning out the bird barns on my dad’s hunting preserve. Later I began conducting agricultural research projects for my soil-scientist uncle. I was in charge of the horticultural studies, growing vegetables in 100 foot rows, much like I do today. While I knew I enjoyed this line of work, I didn’t realize that I would one day try to open my own specialty crop business.
My college years led me to a large city a couple of hours away. I began as a business major. All I really knew is that I wanted to work in a business and make lots of money (ha!) While I did fine in my business classes, I really didn’t know where it was all going to lead.
After a couple of years away from my small-town life, and I realized that a small-town was where I needed to be. A degree in business really didn’t make sense in the small-town world. I found myself enjoying coaching and teaching younger players on my athletic team, and decided that I had the heart of a teacher. So, off I went to change my major from business to teaching.
I loved every minute of my education classes, and just knew that teaching was something I would enjoy for the rest of my life. I never thought I would need all of my experiences taking care of birds, growing and researching vegetables, and learning the in’s and out’s of running a business, but it looks like God has a different plan.
Eventually, I married Berry Man, had a few kids, and had my dream job in my hometown. Life appeared great on the outside…even I thought everything was great. But as time went on, I began to realize that my priorities were way out of order. My job became an idol in my life.
You see, I am quite a perfectionist and thrive on being the very best at everything I do. In order to keep my job during our school’s economic crisis, I decided that it was imperative that I prove that I was the very best teacher in our district in order to keep my job.
This turned into endless hours for researching current best practices, creating differentiated units to meet the needs of each individual students, documenting behaviors and interventions, and when I actually had time…teaching a room full of cherubs.
School came before everything…before God, before my family, before myself.
During that time in my life, I pretty much was just running on fumes all the time, because in addition to all of this, I also ran our developing berry business in my “spare time.” It wasn’t until Berry Man started working here full-time that I was able to actually slow down enough to realize the work that God was doing in my life.
Working in the berry patch in the summer has been my saving grace. Picking berries alone in the field is my time to connect with God. It seems as though when I am out there, everything is right in my world. I can see God all around me, and reflect on life and see His guidance through it all.
With Berry Man taking over many of the day-to-day chores around the homestead, I was able to spend more time reading God’s word and listening to his guidance in prayer. The more time I spent with Him, the more I realized how off-track my life had become.
The more I put God first, the more I can see His path unfolding before me, like a deer trail in the woods. I can see the path, but there are so many branches and thorns in the way that it is difficult to travel, and I am not completely sure the best way to reach my destination.
Patience is not my strong suit, but I know I need to to look for and wait for God’s perfect timing. I can see God’s plan weaving through my experiences, and while I am anxious to be able to homestead and work from home full-time, I know I cannot do these things in my own power.
Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that whoever reads it may run with it. For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay. (Habakkuk 2:2-3)